I was going through a bad phase. A lot of things were really affecting me badly and it's been almost 2 years but I still could not let it go. I failed an exam. Twice. Everyone else passed. They moved on with their lives, working, studying, earning, living. And I was right here. I could've had that. But I didn't.
Don't get me wrong. Leaving that career was the right decision for me. But the pressure, that feeling of not fitting, not belonging, not having that was getting to me. Jealousy, insecurity, anger and humiliation were friends that I lived with everyday.
I only made things even worse b not being able to get it over. It would keep coming back, messing with my confidence, my relationships, my ego. I tried to let go but didn't know how.
Till I realised, You cannot learn how to let go. There is no standard procedure laid out for you. Nor can anyone help you with it. The only person who can do anything about it is you. There will come a day, it may be earth shattering or not so earth shattering but you will know. You will feel that anger leave your body for good. Feel that negativity fade. The worries, the fears, they will all loose that hold on you, loosen their grip and that is when you will let go. and the only person who decided what pace that goes on at, is you.
Don't get me wrong. Leaving that career was the right decision for me. But the pressure, that feeling of not fitting, not belonging, not having that was getting to me. Jealousy, insecurity, anger and humiliation were friends that I lived with everyday.
I only made things even worse b not being able to get it over. It would keep coming back, messing with my confidence, my relationships, my ego. I tried to let go but didn't know how.
Till I realised, You cannot learn how to let go. There is no standard procedure laid out for you. Nor can anyone help you with it. The only person who can do anything about it is you. There will come a day, it may be earth shattering or not so earth shattering but you will know. You will feel that anger leave your body for good. Feel that negativity fade. The worries, the fears, they will all loose that hold on you, loosen their grip and that is when you will let go. and the only person who decided what pace that goes on at, is you.